stop saying good job

Stop saying good job. I know, it feels like the nice thing to do. But here is the problem: "good job" is so vague your kid has no idea what they actually did right, so they cannot repeat it on purpose. Instead, name the exact thing you liked. Instead of "good job," try: "You put your shoes on all by yourself." Instead of "good job," try: "You shared your truck with your sister. That was so kind." When you name it, you are handing your kid a map of exactly which behaviors earn your attention. And kids repeat whatever gets attention. Same effort from you, way bigger payoff. Try it today and watch what happens.