3 phrases that make difficult people easier to deal with

3 phrases that make difficult people easier to deal with They complain. They resist. They make everything harder than it needs to be. And most people either avoid them or argue with them. Neither works. Here are 3 phrases that actually do. Phrase 1: "Help me understand what you need here." Difficult people are usually difficult because they feel unheard. They're not actually trying to make your life harder. They're trying to be heard. So instead of defending or explaining, you ask: "Help me understand what you need here." You didn't agree with them. You just made space for them to be heard. And that alone de-escalates most situations. Phrase 2: "What would it take to move forward?" Use this when someone keeps complaining but won't offer solutions. They're stuck. And they want to stay stuck because it's easier than taking action. "What would it take to move forward?" forces them out of complaint mode and into solution mode. Most of the time, they either name something reasonable, and now you can work with that. Or they realize they just want to complain, and the conversation ends. Phrase 3: "I'm going to need you to work with me on this." This is for when someone's being stubborn or obstructive. It's not a request. It's a statement. "I'm going to need you to work with me on this." You're not asking for permission. You're setting the expectation. And you just shifted the dynamic from them resisting to them deciding whether to cooperate. Difficult people don't need to be avoided or argued with. They need to be redirected.